Friday, December 19, 2014

Lorna Faith: Surrendering All Of Who You Are

Everyone's Story welcomes back with much affection the amazing Lorna Faith. Ever since I've started this blog three and a half years ago my aim has been to uplift and encourage others, especially rejoicing in God's love for all of us. That's why I'm glad Lorna is once again appearing here and at the end of the year when, sure, we're facing the joys of Christmas but what follows is the New Year. At this time many of us tend to look back and wonder if there's a lesson to learn as we advance into the young days of the new year, not wanting to make the same mistakes or stay in a rut. If you can relate to this, then you will also appreciate Lorna's words. Also, check out her BookGiveaway--for 2 lucky winners. Both Lorna and I look forward to hearing from you.

May you each have a joyous Christmas and a peaceful New Year.



BookGiveaway:
Lorna is offering 1 e-version of her novel ANSWERING ANNAVETA to 2 randomly drawn commenters. The winner will be announced here on Friday, December 26th between 5-6 PM EST. To be entered in the Giveaway, please leave your contact information within your comment



How The Impossible Becomes Possible by Lorna Faith

I bought into the myth of perfection for too many years. In other words, I put unrealistic expectations on myself, got stressed out and basically did all I could do to show myself as perfect to the world. That’s how anyone wins in life.

As a result I ended up with what life coach and author Christine Hassler calls “Expectation Hangover.” She defines it as “...when our reality does not match the expectations we are so attached to, we experience a crash - similar to a hangover from too much alcohol.”

Somewhere along the way we’ve all had expectations either handed down to us or we have created expectations. You know the usual ones: be successful, make a lot of money, get married, have children, look good, make a difference and many more. This is where the pressure comes in—to get it right. Or else we feel like we fail at life. I went for a few years like this—living in this pressure zone and constantly feeling like I was failing. It was this past year, where I finally had an epiphany that this was what I was doing to myself. 

Sadly, it took getting so stressed out my hands started shaking and my mind felt like it was closing in on itself from burn out, before I finally got the hint that something needed to change. I realized that somewhere along the way, I had exchanged my original childhood innocence of trusting God and feeling like I was whole and complete and living a life of love , to living everyday full of fear and distrust. 

Courtesy Google Images
I had moved into a fear zone for a few reasons: someone criticized me; I only was appreciated for what I did well; I got yelled at or slapped for simple mistakes; my heart was broken; I was told that my dreams were impossible; I felt incredible pressure to succeed; I got rejected; I made a mistake and judged myself as a failure; I compared myself to others and in someway believed they were better than I was. If you can relate to even one of these disappointments, you might also have moved into a place of fear in some area of your life.

I realized that when fear grips a person, they experience a sense of disconnection and emptiness. Other people’s voices become much louder than our own and we find it almost impossible to hear the Spirit’s voice in our lives.

This is what happened to me. It was time for me to stop obeying the voices of fear and uncertainty that was crowding my mind, and to have faith.
Yet living with faith, means conflict. You can’t get away from it. Faith is that invisible essence that drops it’s weapons of mass destruction and leaves craters in our soul, as we struggle to become what we hear on the inside of us.

My big aha moment was that all those fears and uncertainties had lulled me into a comatose state where I was afraid of the wrong things. I realized that the greater fear was to have lived and died and not found out who I really was... than to put my head in the sand worried about everything else. It was time to give all my wrestling to God and surrender to grace. To let go of all those hurts and painful moments from my past... from things that I had lost.

In my heart I feel like God is saying something like this to all of us: Now I’m going to let you do what you couldn’t do before. What you failed at and could never get to happen, will happen now. You were angry with Me because I didn’t let it happen before. You thought I said ‘no’ but I really said ‘later.’

Most of all surrender all of who you are to God and let His grace and love envelop you. You’ll be amazed by what happens in your life. Suddenly, like Mary experienced, grace will make the impossible, possible.

Visit Lorna on previous Everyone's Story segment: What To Do With Life Changing Moments


Lorna's Ah-hahs To Tweet:
Everyone has a story: Learn why author & #SocialMedia guide @lornafaith wants to help others (Tweet This)

Check out Lorna Faith’s @lornafaith exciting #BookGiveaway (Tweet This)

Lorna Faith: do you obey the voice of fear or faith? (Tweet This)

Author's Bio and places to connect with Lorna:
Lorna Faith loves all things romantic, historical and filled with adventure. A graduate of the University of Lethbridge with a degree in Music, she teaches students by day and scribbles away on her next novel by night. Lorna enjoys helping others tell the stories they love on social media. She and her husband have 2 College age children and 2 teenagers and live in Southern Alberta near the Rocky Mountains. Answering Annaveta is her 1st novel... with Book #2 coming in May 2015. You can chat with her at one of her two blogs, Lornafaith.com orRawStoryLife.com or on Facebook or Twitter.




30 comments:

  1. Welcome back, Lorna! Thanks for sharing more of your story with us. I hope your writing is going well. Merry Christmas to you and your family.

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    1. Lisa, I'm happy to see you here, my sweet friend! Thanks for visiting.

      I love & respect Lorna's honesty and willingness to share her thoughts. She's such an encouragement.

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    2. Thanks for the great welcome Lisa:) I'm happy to be back here on Elaine's amazing blog! My writing has been going good these past couple of months...now that I've come through some of the toughest parts of this year to the other side. Merry Christmas to you and your family too :)

      Thanks Elaine for your kind words - I really appreciate you & how you encourage everyone around you :)

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    3. You've made me smile, Lorna… thank you! Believe me, I understand about rough spots in life.

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  2. What a lovely cover. Books are always my request for Christmas. I like your transparency. Barbara Anne Waite

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    1. So appreciate your visit this evening. Have yourself a very merry Christmas.

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    2. I'm happy you like the book cover Barbara and the honesty of this post. Transparency is something God is helping me to do more and more - most of the time its uncomfortable and stretches me, but it's all good :) Also, like you I love to receive books as gifts for Christmas! Have a very merry Christmas with your family!

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  3. Most of all surrender all . . That is such good advice.. thanks for your thoughts, I think most of us have heard God say NOt yet.. and PTL it came later when we could better handle it.. God bless & Merry Christmas !
    dkstevensne AT outlook DoTCoM

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    1. Deanna, with each passing day of my life I learn that His timing is always right on… and I am so thankful.

      Joyous Christmas blessings to you.

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    2. It's so true Deanna - at first surrendering isn't easy, but its really where we find the peace and comfort we need when we're walking through the tough times. It is great that God knows the right timing for what He wants to give us. God Bless you too Deanna and have a wonderful Christmas!

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  4. I've learned His timing is so much better than mine. If I'd been published any earlier I would have been so embarrassed. I wasn't ready and my writing wasn't ready. Great post!

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    1. As always, Pat, I'm grateful for your visit and for sharing your thoughts. I thought I was ready years ago to be published, but looking back I think God knew it would have been all about me and not to His glory. Big difference.

      Christmas blessings.

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  5. It's so true Patricia - God's timing is so much better than ours :) I'm happy you liked the post... thanks so much for stopping by. And Merry Christmas to you and your family Patricia :)

    Love your perspective Elaine !

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  6. Loved your introduction, Elaine. The New Year is both exciting and anxiety producing, and Lorna's advice of 'surrendering all of who we are to God' is a great reminder that He has it covered. We just need to trust. When I find myself striving for perfection (something I know I'll never accomplish) I remember a friend's sage advice, "dare to be adequate." Blessings to you both!

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    1. Kathy, I'm glad and grateful for your visit. Trust is NOT a naturally built in human trait and perhaps that's why God has incorporated it as a mandate for us all. As for reflection at the end of the calendar year I'm learning that I only get muddled up when I reflect on me and what has happened in my world rather than reflect what has happened in His world and how He has carried me through it.

      May you be blessed with a joyous Christmas and a kind, gentle New Year, my friend.

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    2. Kathy - I loved Elaine introduction too!
      Elaine you are an amazing encourager and friend :)

      Kathy your friend's words "dare to be adequate"... is sage advice. I'm glad I'm not the only one who has struggled with perfectionism. But as you said, it is amazing that we can trust God for our future and trust His grace is enough :) Thanks so much for stopping by. Have a wonderful Christmas with your family!

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  7. Elaine, Sorry for not being present often enough. I read your posts once in a while but no time or energy to visit the site. This is a great post...a topic after my own heart. The older I grow the more I trust God and his timing with everything in my life and that of my family. For one, like Patricia Bradley above, every time I tried to publish my book in the past three years, something happens to stop me. Thank God, because this book of mine has a mind of its own, taking me where God wants it to go. Merry Christmas, filled with joy, love, and miracles and a New Year blessed with many possibilities!

    Lorna, welcome back. I too often need time and space to deal with life but it's always great to return. Your book sounds great and seems to be touching many of the topics I write about. Fears are there to protect us. It's up to us not to surrender to them but rather trust in God that there is a purpose and a time for everything, ourselves and life included. Glad I got to know better. Wishing you all the best for Christmas and the New Year. Always!

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    1. Katina, thank you so much for visiting and sharing your thoughts. I hope the delay in posting your comment until the morning after hasn't scared you away… I am no night owl.

      Your words are such an encouragement to me. In a world of much discouragement my aim on this blog is to uplift others, but I often wonder how effective this weekly effort is. When I hear such beautifully expressed words such as yours I am grateful.

      I've written--in aim of publication--for so many years now that I have stopped counting. I've had many detours--which, like any other road blocks I did not see coming my way. Like the amazing Nora Roberts has said, writing is a heck of a lot cheaper than psychotherapy!

      I think, part of my personal writing stumbling comes down to aiming for the wrong market. Now that I've switched over to the CBA market and have decided to write Christian faith-based stories I am beginning to see a difference. Baby steps. This month of December finds me actually having 2 different short stories out in printed anthologies that are on sell to the public. Sure, they aren't novels--yet--but I'm working on that too. In God's timing.

      And here's the thing about God's timing that I'm learning: He works on His own timing regardless if one believes in His power or not…but the real joy is discovering that He does so and accepting that He does so.

      I've reflected some about this on my "Thoughts" page if you'd like to see. Scroll down to #17.

      Info about my 2 anthologies are on my "Fiction" page.

      Katina, keep following wherever God may lead you. You will always be in the right spot in life.

      God bless. May your Christmas be joyous and your New Year a peaceful, gentle one.

      Hope to see you again!

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    2. Hi Katina - I'm happy to meet up with you again on Elaine's wonderful blog:) I'm glad also that the topic of surrender resonates with you too. Wise words to not surrender to fear but to trust that God has the purpose & timing figured out! Thanks so much for stopping by. And I wish you a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year too Katina!

      Elaine you are so encouraging and an inspiration to me and to many other people too:) Thanks for sharing what you're learning and what you've been going through in your own writing process. Congratulations for publishing 2 short stories... that's exciting - you'll get that novel out there soon! You're an inspiration to me in staying faithful to what God has put on your heart... love that:)

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    3. Lorna, I'm humbling blushing. Thanks for your sweet words.

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  8. Hi Lorna. I really enjoyed your post. As I embark on a very different venture in the New Year, I'm leaning on the faith that it will work out and struggling to suppress the fear!

    Here's wishing you and Elaine a joyous Christmas and a blessed New Year!

    patti(dot)shene(at)gmail(dot)com

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    1. Patti, I always enjoy and appreciate when you visit.

      Whatever you're venturing into I hope and pray the best for you and for God's blessings.

      May you also have a God-blessed Christmas and a gentle New Year, my friend.

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    2. Hi Patti, I'm happy you stopped by and that this post resonated with you :) What a great attitude you have as you are leaning in faith as you embark on this new venture. You'll do great :) I'm feeling a similar fear that's wanting to pull me in as I start some new things - but I'm not giving into fear. Like you I'm choosing faith instead! Have a wonderful and happy Christmas and New Year too!

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  9. I just stumbled across this inspiring message and want to share, especially based on the flow of conversation here:

    https://www.biblegateway.com/devotionals/encouragement-for-today/2014/12/17

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    1. This is an inspiring post Elaine! I love what she said "When we remain close to God in the hard places, there's fruit." To hold tightly to a faith that is bigger than we are... love that kind of trust! Thanks for sharing Elaine... wonderful words :)

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  10. Thank you for sharing your testimony, Lorna. I can definitely relate.
    I still have times I need to deal with expectation hangover,
    especially this time of year. Thanks for the reminder that my
    expectations are self inflicted--not God given.

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    1. I hear you, Kathy, on those self-inflicted pressures. So happy God takes care of us!

      Joyous Christmas blessings.

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    2. I'm so glad to know I'm not the only one who has dealt with Expectation Hangover, Kathleen. It's so good that God shows up in our lives in different ways - to remind us that He's got us and is guiding our steps :) Something I'm learning everyday. Thanks so much for stopping by Kathleen - hope you had a great Christmas!

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  11. It's Christmas week and I've personally enjoyed everyone's company so much on this blog that I've felt as if I've hosted my guest, Lorna, and her viewers as company over at my home. Well, actually, my blog is my cyber home so to that extent I thank everyone for the great company!

    Lorna, once again I thank you for guesting on Everyone's Story. It's a true pleasure to spotlight you. I pray that you are blessed with much happiness as you make others feel.

    Thanks too for your generous BookGiveaway to 2 lucky winners. And they are…

    Kathleen R. and Katina V. So happy for you two!! Both Lorna and I will be in direct contact with you shortly.

    May God bless you all as you go into the New Year. May 2015 be a kind and gentle one for all.

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